The ongoing saga of a weekly That-Was-The-Week-That-Was posting.
Commenting on things that caught my attention for better or for
worse and left me shaking my fist at the sky and shouting "Whyyyy!!!"
Any one who has ever held a job for any length of time will know the gut-wrenching feeling of depression that comes with looking at your watch and knowing that there are still three hours until hometime.
Sure: there are days when our jobs whiz along like the proverbial bullet from a gun, but then there are the days when no one else is about, the systems are slow and you have that thing that you are doing in the evening and the day just can't go fast enough.
Much like the above picture of a bra in the road (or possibly two eggs on toast) there are peaks and troughs in a day. For instance: it seems impossible to get from 2pm to 5pm and then finally once you get to 3 or 4pm you get into the downhill section where you can take your weary feet off the pedals and allow gravity to do the work as you slide down the bannister of your office stairs and leap like a gazelle into your waiting car.
So for old time's sake and because its been a while - here's a list of 5 things you can do to pass the time
#1: Tea Tennis
Find an unsuspecting member of staff - someone who will sometimes say yes to a proffered cup of tea, but will sometimes say no. Then, and without telling them what you are doing, take it in turns to offer a lovely brew. If they say yes then you score a point, if they say no then your opponent scores the point - NB: this game only works until the victim realizes what you are up to at which point (assuming you haven't finished a match) whoever is in the lead wins
#2: Radio Bingo
If you are allowed to have a radio on in your office tune it to a local radio station. Local radio stations, at least in the UK, seem to come off a production line and are identical. The set up is: A male (main) presenter who is about 5% as funny as he thinks he is, accompanied by a female (support) presenter who is 95% more intelligent than she pretends to be on air (but has to play the idiot for the job)
The play lists of these stations vary little from day to day - so the trick is to write a list of artists that you think will be played on a specific day - and the first to tick them all off wins
#3: Imaginary Shot Drinking
I don't drink alcohol very often - I've had a bottle of wine open for nearly two months now and its not finished yet and I certainly wouldn't advocate drinking at work, but I have a colleague who has a habit of saying the same phrase quite frequently and so I recently tried to imagine downing a shot every time they used the verbal crutch. Just as well I didn't do it for real as I would have been inebriated in under ten minutes and dead within twenty
#4: Lunctime Walk Bingo
I actually went as far as to create some rules for this one before realizing that I see the same things far too often. For instance:
* a single abandoned shopping trolley would gain 5 points because just seeing one alone is so rare, whereas for every additional trolley you see would cost you a point
* A freshly broken window would get you a point, but you can only count it again if it hasn't been mended after 3 months
* A speeding car that fails to indicate would be minus points as its so frequent
#5: Scanning Cricket
A bit out of date this one as scanning documents is so rare now - the rules were that you gained runs until the scanner malfunctioned and then were "out" - you could probably devise a modern equivalent that counts emails with attachments against without
#6: Word Of The Day
This one is courtesy of Argent who was once challenged to try and get the phrase/word "Babycakes" into a meeting with a client. The rules, then, are clear - pick an obscure or made up word and challenge your fellow workers to work it into a conversation or meeting without anyone questioning it.
The prize in each of the above is a cup of lovely tea (or possibly coffee if you're that way inclined)
So for old time's sake and because its been a while - here's a list of 5 things you can do to pass the time
#1: Tea Tennis
Find an unsuspecting member of staff - someone who will sometimes say yes to a proffered cup of tea, but will sometimes say no. Then, and without telling them what you are doing, take it in turns to offer a lovely brew. If they say yes then you score a point, if they say no then your opponent scores the point - NB: this game only works until the victim realizes what you are up to at which point (assuming you haven't finished a match) whoever is in the lead wins
#2: Radio Bingo
If you are allowed to have a radio on in your office tune it to a local radio station. Local radio stations, at least in the UK, seem to come off a production line and are identical. The set up is: A male (main) presenter who is about 5% as funny as he thinks he is, accompanied by a female (support) presenter who is 95% more intelligent than she pretends to be on air (but has to play the idiot for the job)
The play lists of these stations vary little from day to day - so the trick is to write a list of artists that you think will be played on a specific day - and the first to tick them all off wins
#3: Imaginary Shot Drinking
I don't drink alcohol very often - I've had a bottle of wine open for nearly two months now and its not finished yet and I certainly wouldn't advocate drinking at work, but I have a colleague who has a habit of saying the same phrase quite frequently and so I recently tried to imagine downing a shot every time they used the verbal crutch. Just as well I didn't do it for real as I would have been inebriated in under ten minutes and dead within twenty
#4: Lunctime Walk Bingo
I actually went as far as to create some rules for this one before realizing that I see the same things far too often. For instance:
* a single abandoned shopping trolley would gain 5 points because just seeing one alone is so rare, whereas for every additional trolley you see would cost you a point
* A freshly broken window would get you a point, but you can only count it again if it hasn't been mended after 3 months
* A speeding car that fails to indicate would be minus points as its so frequent
#5: Scanning Cricket
A bit out of date this one as scanning documents is so rare now - the rules were that you gained runs until the scanner malfunctioned and then were "out" - you could probably devise a modern equivalent that counts emails with attachments against without
#6: Word Of The Day
This one is courtesy of Argent who was once challenged to try and get the phrase/word "Babycakes" into a meeting with a client. The rules, then, are clear - pick an obscure or made up word and challenge your fellow workers to work it into a conversation or meeting without anyone questioning it.
The prize in each of the above is a cup of lovely tea (or possibly coffee if you're that way inclined)
10 comments:
Oh I HAVE to know if Argent was successful. Babycakes. Snort :)
I'm listening to recorded calls (part of my job) & the rep just said "know what I mean?" which is sort of like you know...
What's a very chest band? I'm so intrigued I almost want to click it.
I love the imaginary shot one! Just had a 2 days of meetings and I could have so done with it. Or an actual bottle of gin.
Does one drink gin in shots at all? Is it just tequila?
a 2 days of meetings? I think maybe it was a very two-day meeting.
I like imaginary shot drinking, but why stop short of the real thing---productivity be damned.
Bug - i'm sure we all have our stock phrases, mine is "without further ado"
Titus - i seem to have had a lot of spam comments recently, and have no idea what a very chest band would be either!
Stephen - some years ago i did have a manager whose "bottle of water" smelt of something stronger...
You sure pegged the regular morning radio duos over here. I never worked where radios were allowed, so that game is one that escaped me. I still scan stuff here at home, which is as boring as ever, so could play your game at times here (just refinanced the home loan and did lots of scanning to email the loan officer).
Argent's game is hilarious. I wish I was still working to play these....well, maybe not. But anyway, have you left work behind? I ask because of this sentence: "So for old time's sake and because its been a while..."
I did sort-of get babycakes into a phone-call with our client. Right at the end, so not sure if he heard it. We have a new game now. For this one, you need to be on a call with people you've not spoken to before and have not met. The challenge here is to do something like speak in a scottish accent the whole time. So far, not had a call with all complete strangers, so am waiting on that one.
Our team had, for a while, to produce a weekly report of our activities. My boss hates this kind of nonsense, so used to fill it up with stuff sbout the ducks and other animals on our business park and pictures of cats. Our senior management steers well clear of us now - result!
Ad then there are the pencils to be counted and lined up . . . . or don’t you have them anymore?
Lydia - the "been a while" comment was to do with the List-O-Fives, which i haven't done for a while, sadly i still have to work :(
Argent - i like the accent thing and have a comedy irish accent ready and waiting
Friko - we're not allowed pens and paper to protect customer details. Computers with email access yes, pen and paper no.
And if you're looking at that statement thinking "well where's the sense in that?" join the club
brilliant
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