What Did John Tracy Do Wrong?

Let's face it: if Spectrum were looking for agents to fight The Mysterons now they'd have a much tougher time choosing code names.

Back in the days of Supermarionation, of course, it was all a lot easier.  Each agent was named after a colour - but of course the problem comes when you run out of the primaries and have to move on.

Captains White, Green, Black and Scarlett may all sound pretty impressive, but in the meantime since the 1960s the paint companies have got more creative with their tones, leaving today's secret operatives named Leutennant White-with-a-hint-of-apricot or Sergent Rich Havana - somehow having less of a decisive ring.

Even so the problems of Admiral Mango Melody fade into obscurity when compared to John Tracy, pilot of Thunderbird 5.  Based in outer-space.

There can be little or no doubt that Scott and Virgin (NB - i just realized that I typed Virgin instead of Virgil here - but was so amused by this surely Freudian slip that i kept it - i mean, surely no one believes that anyone on Tracy Island was having any form of rumpy-pumpy, with the possible exception of John who may well have been exiled for that very reason) were the favoured sons on Tracy Island.  They got to fly the coolest ships, hang around the pool with Brains and didn't have any of the having to put up with that annoying fish lady from Stingray that other rescuers had to do (you know the one, with her own song - Maaaariiiiinaaaa, aqua maaaaariiina: what is that strange, enchanting smell of fish, whenever you're neeeeeaaar...) .

Even Alan and Gordon had it better than John - which begs the question: what was it that John Tracy did that was so bad that they permanently exiled him to space?

Did he have body odor issues?  Halitosis?  Was he a fugitive from the law?

Maybe he'd had an illicit affair with Lady Penelope (strictly whilst Parker was away, you understand), or that girl who's role at Tracy Island was unclear (you know the one, hung around the island always wearing kimonos - her)

Perhaps there was some big family fall out after a rescue went wrong, or he was deeply jealous of Virgil and sabotaged Thunderbird 2

Or maybe he was just really irritating: always asking people to pull his finger, reminding people of every last thing they had ever said, refusing to stop eulogizing over obscure pieces of machinery (with accompanying slide-show)

But whatever it was: I hope that eventually the rest of the family managed to find it in their hearts to let him come back to earth before Lou Grade cancelled the series.

After all, family - and home - is the place that, no matter what you've done - they always have to let you come back...eventually.

NB: According to the record on Wikipedia the main reason that John Tracy was permanently stationed in outer-space was that even Gerry Anderson didn't like him very much...which goes to show that whatever he'd done - it must have been pretty bad.